Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
