it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
