hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
