carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
our cab driver is having phone sex.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
