I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
