reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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