she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Randomize
