so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
