My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
