it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
We named our party play list daddy issues
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
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