when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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