You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
