I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
i came on her dog
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
You can't just leave with hair like that
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
