He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
