I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
