I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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