All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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