Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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