have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
