Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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