Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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