he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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