Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
