ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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