Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
so let's talk penis.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
