every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
