Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
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