Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
