In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
