My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Randomize
