nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Randomize
