I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
i believe in u and ur pee
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
