Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Girls should come with a carfax report
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
