Are we in a gay sports bar?
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
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