your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
The air taste purple.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
