Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
