i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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