If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
