Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
