Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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