They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
