Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
