Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
