I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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