That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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