Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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