so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
