strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
my being single is dangerous.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
