We won't sleep together?
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Randomize
