sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
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