If that was your dad, he is hot
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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